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International Bereaved Mother’s Day

Today is a source of pain.

To be completely honest

I’ve been burying it in

the back of my mind.

Similar to what I’ve done

With my feelings.

This face is someone

that I miss so desperately.

He is one that

This imperfect world

never got the chance to see.

To his fullest potential,

he just wasn’t there yet.

And neither was I.

It is so interesting

how I am a viable witness

to watch my entire world

pass by around me.

And yet,

this little person

that I spent every hour

of my day with....

Just gone.

And the world is OK with that.

The world moves on.

And all the while my heart

is screaming in

tears and torture.

My mind constantly takes me back

to when he was born,

his first word, his first step.

And here I sit.

Completely amazed

by the world that I sit in.

Amazed, not in a good way.

By crossing the threshold

of becoming a loss parent,

I have found that people

can be very cruel and mean.

But how can this be?

The answer is quite simple. They have never known

a joy as true and authentic as this.

This right here is other bliss.

Not like anything else.

This type of joy can change their life.

It can change their way of thinking.

And it is something that has left me.

If you are suffering

with a hurting heart this

Mother’s Day,

this day is for you.

This day you can use

to honor your child.

Say their name.

Say it proudly.

Because after all,

that is our job.

A very important job.

In loving memory of the

very first boy who

stole my heart

and ran to

infinity and beyond.

Bo William Hartwig

I love you so much.

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